Why do you crave the inner
And meanwhile shun the outer?
I do not shun the outer
I meet it at Joy’s door
But I seek to know what lies inside
And thus knowing, savour both outer and inner
It is as if I have fallen under the spell of love
You are wise Prophetess
But you are more than wise
You are the Waking Dream
Lucy Lopez
I have a longing. It is to penetrate reality. Why? To know. What? Ah, I almost fell for that one!
What is it that I wish to know? The unknown? The unknowable? The Nameless? The Ein Sof as it is referred to in the Jewish tradition?
Or, do I wish to know whatever there is to be known or whatever can be known? And if so, why?
Well, in either case, Why? is still an important question to ask. And answer.
Why do I wish to know anything? Because, on some level, I believe I will be happier for it. And actually, I am sure that on some level, I believe I will find complete happiness when I do know whatever it is that I am longing to know.
The child asks questions. It seems to have an innate need to know. Or at least to ask. Interestingly, it only begins to question after it has learned to speak - only after it has acquired a new toy/tool. A tool of separation - language.
Did it have questions before it acquired this toy/tool? Unlikely, since 'it' was not limited to the boundaries of 'its' skin. On the contrary, 'it' was everything and experienced 'itself' as (part of) everything. No sense of separation.
And the child, now grown up, has been conditioned by a need to know. But the need to know can sometimes overpower the longing to know, the desire to know. A desire, so sweet and so intoxicating, as if under the spell of love....
That is a beautiful verse, at the top - it teaches me that dreams can grow and blossom - only when there is a still point of no resistance through which they can surface - when inward and outward forces are in balance.
ReplyDeleteTo show amazement or surprise would only indicate that prior expectations have been challenged - so I won't, I'll call it synchronicity. My mind has been occupied with these exact same subjects recently - and curiosity - for inner and outer knowledge - is bringing me to the end of a marathon stint here at my PC - almost 24 hrs!
So off to bed soon.
My curiosity as a child was sometimes mistaken as willful destruction - but de-construction is not the same. (You resurrect my childhood memories somehow.) I remember a brand new football on a birthday - I remember a pointed tie pin - I remember lying - that "my tie pin fell on it!" - (how naive?) - when the strange deflating plastic shape was spotted in my hands.
But it was just out of curiosity, honest!
Our childhood is strewn with jewels that sparkle, setting alight insight!
ReplyDeleteYes, you do seem to have done a bit of a marathon today! A good night's rest will do wonders to clear the cobwebs and freshen the mansion of the mind :-)
Thanks for your comment Tim. It is a joy to see one thought, idea, word, verse spark off other ideas, words, memories...
May we continue to enjoy the gift of conversation :-)