Saturday, March 21, 2009

I keep pushing her away

Why miss an opportunity? When is the moment perfect if not now?

She considered herself. Took note of her vulnerabilities, assessed her failures and reluctantly recalled her successes. The rain, so brief, was audible as it hit the ground in front of her and pelted the large frangipani leaves that arose in a ceramic pot just beside the white fence. Not alone but feeling as if she were, she closed her eyes. It was the one way she knew to lose her solid self and dissolve in a dark and vast space, free from judgment.

Within seconds, she felt the glare of sunlight through her closed eyelids. Ah, how she preferred the darkness. It was comforting in its mystery and magnitude. "I must tell him" she thought. "I must. I'll never forgive myself if I don't".

Sometimes god hugs me and
I have no idea
I keep pushing her away

It is as if
I hate her
But how could I when
I don't really
know her?

The Child that I am

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